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PowerUP!

Present Yourself with Courage, Competence, and Confidence

INTRODUCTION TO THE BOOK

 “The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any.”

                                                                                                                     –Alice Walker

You have more power than you think. Tap into it and you’ll be amazed at the rewards that come your way.

As an ambitious child growing up in a Dutch Calvinist community in Grand Rapids, Michigan, I often puzzled over what it meant to be a successful “lady.”  Even in that God-fearing, non-materialistic community where humility and virtue were honored, it was clear to me that beautiful was best. Alas, in spite of my energetic prancing and twirling in my mom’s castoff clothing, it didn’t look like beautiful was going to pan out for me.

One day when my dearest friend, BJ, and I were playing princess, we ended up side by side in front of a mirror. “Who do you think is prettiest?” I asked. It was a loaded question, for I knew BJ to be particularly attractive.  But she was also clever and kind, and she replied, “Every girl likes to think she’s prettiest.”

She was right. However, being of sound mind and eyesight I could not convince myself that, in fact, I was prettiest. Disappointed but not deterred, I decided at that moment to find other ways to make my mark in the world. After conducting some carefully plotted social experiments I began to suspect that I was not just a hapless soul who needed to accept that she would always be less than society’s ideal. There was hope.

A few years later, this growing sense that I might have some control over my fate was reinforced.  My mother, a loving, down to earth straight-talking woman was making dinner. I was in the nearby family room sewing myself a snazzy new outfit with which I hoped to wow a few people. “Hey Ma,” I shouted, “Do you think I’m beautiful?”  I held my breath. She loved me dearly, but she was an honest person. What would she say? After a pause she replied, “No, Patsy, you’re quite average; but I think you’ve got them all fooled.”

Shazam!” I thought. “My plan is working!” It was proof positive that I had the power to affect how people experienced me! This early success made me intent on finding ways to build on it.  The answer seemed to lie in uncovering the keys to effective self-expression and the power to influence others.

My undergraduate and graduate work in theater provided new insights into the use of the body, imagination and voice to communicate thoughts and emotions. My classes in rhetoric showed me how to use logic, emotion, and credibility to move people. A combination of the tools of theater and rhetoric applied to everyday encounters proved potent. When I tried them out systematically I discovered that I could effectively choose the figure I would cut, the impression I would make, the respect I would command, and the way people would respond to me.  

Applying these principles gave me the confidence to live life my way and not be constrained by the standards of others.  Change and adventure appeal to me. I’ve switched careers, moved to new places, chosen different lifestyles, and reinvented myself on a number of occasions. And because I’ve learned how to thrive anywhere, I’ve been able to follow my heart.

I have taught these skills to undergraduate and graduate students, to professionals and volunteers, to managers and CEOs, and to for-profit and not-for-profit organizations.  The principles are based on ancient wisdom and are universally applicable.

Even in this age of high tech, humans connect most powerfully in person. When we choose to be fully present, intentional, and generous in our interactions with others, we are able to shape productive, satisfying lives for ourselves. With greater agency we are also better equipped to make meaningful contributions in the world.

This book is for people who want to be able to show up anywhere with confidence and ease.

You’ve already got the goods – now I’ll show you how to power them up!

“I dwell in possibility…”

–Emily Dickinson